A Life Lost Searching For Love

By David Steffens

The search for your one and only true love can seem endless at times. When you reach the time when you desire your perfect partner the end result may be so fundamentally different based on your own make-up as well as destiny.

When you discover somebody new the voyage unfolds rapidly along with a power that defies explanation. Every single one of us starts off with that total infatuation which usually sees a person smitten past belief and incapable of thinking of little else but the brilliance of the man or woman that you're quickly falling deeply in love with. The emotions soak up every single second of the day and the dreams of the moments previously spent invade every degree of your consciousness.

This completely new romantic relationship surges forth with a stunning and potent force. It sees you living, laughing and crying with your new perfect companion whilst you discover and understand each and every component of their being. You wait on each and every little word while you hear the tales of their lives. Their younger years, their loved ones, the destinations they have journeyed to, their studies as well as their prior romances. The happy occasions they have experienced together with the disasters they may have faced. You'd like to learn every little thing about them and cherish each and every piece of information disclosed.

When you're away from your brand new love you can't but remember the last minutes which you spent by their side and perhaps how long it is going to be before you hear their voice or will be with them again. The memories of what they looked like, the things they might of said and the clothes they were wearing the previous time you met.

You might find yourself swiftly getting yourself into such a serious attraction which seems so unbelievably surreal that you could only think about spending almost every possible second with your brand new love. You get together in every available moment and begin hanging out at each others' homes to ensure that you never miss anything. Everything which occurs between you together with the one that you yearn for seems completely perfect and you don't think to question anything about everything that is taking place for each of you.

For a lot of people this love and sensation continues and grows without end, with the relationship which you share increasing with each and every instant which you share with each other. However for many of you there may be a growing discontent or perhaps concern about your developing relationship. You could have tiny worrying thought processes popping up at the back of your head which can be resulting in you asking yourself if you're really prepared for this degree of interconnection and responsibility.

Love happens whenever we least expect it and for many the experience supplies a a feeling of total satisfaction and delivers a voyage which will last forever. Love however may also be an interval in a pair of peoples' lives in which they will share an incredible period prior to agreeing to proceed forward individually, recognizing that an incredible time was had but the future contains different things for each of them.

This isn't a period in one's life that will require frustration and desperation. The old saying that there are many fish in the sea should be utilized not simply while we are single and seeking, but furthermore when we're not really convinced that we've found the love of our lives. The quest for love might appear to be challenging sometimes and may place complicated and puzzling situations in the way. This however isn't an indication for us to quit, but a time to keep working at it and carry on the quest for that ideal partner, your true love and soul mate.

Love - What's All the Fuss About It???

Indeed you will believe me that there are many articles written about love. Some people mock it and many other can expound on it continuously. With all that one can read about this emotion called love, we learn, it's an emotion, love is a commitment. I agree with all these, what about the one whom doesn't believe in love? Could it be, they are yet to experience it? Could it be, the emotion called love is truly something they don't understand because the word is used recklessly? Or probably its illusive to them.

What's all the fuss about it?

Ten people can define love and all ten will disagree at some point with the other. Some will say love is a commitment, while others will say, no...You commit because you love. I believe both are true. The one thing I believe we all have in common (those who believe in love) is, love is shown by your actions. Does it really matter that you commit because you love? Or, that love is a commitment? Either way, it is defined by your actions. It is a sacrifice because until something valuable to you lives your hand and goes to the one you love, you don't truly love.

Contrary to the belief as experienced by those who say "love does not exist"; you don't have to look so hard to find out more about it. Poets write about it, recording artist sing about it, preachers preach about it. Roy Croft, a poet wrote, "I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you'. Aren't we a different person when we are with the one we love? What a powerful emotion, that has the power to transform us into almost someone else.

Is it a Noun or Verb

It's both. However, if the object of your affection only expresses it in the form of a noun, something is definitely missing. Anybody can say "I love you". Saying I love you, is relatively easy, but when you can prove it buy your actions, you're really saying something. Love is an action word; love is something that you show by your actions over consistent periods of time. There is consistency in love. Yes, you will have your disagreements and maybe an argument, love will not let you rest easy when things are wrong.

Love will

Love will anticipate your needs and do everything in trying to meet them, sometimes you can't eat and you anticipate bed time so you can just talk or hold the one you love. Love will comfort you, protect you; love will not harm you. I can probably fill the pages of this article with the thing love will do. What about what love will not do? It won't hurt you, imprison you, falsely accuse you, nor strike you. You may be reading this article and think, all this talk about love is a bunch of crap, it doesn't change what millions of people feel everyday about this thing called love. Love is something you show and it's deeper than what you see on the outside of a person.

What's all the fuss about? The idea, concept or possibility of love and loving somebody is foolish to many; they will say "love dent exist" or it's foolish to think that anyone will feel like that towards another person. All of the negative thoughts and feelings one may have to this emotion called love, doesn't make it disappear from the hearts and souls of the people who love, that's what all the fuss is about. When we begin to think about showing love in its true and purest form our world will become a better place because it will be completely void of hurting people.

'10 Key Principles About Relationships'.

# 1: Finding your voice: It's important to remember that the self is continually reinvented through our interactions with others. Every relationship is a laboratory in which we can practice using our voice in new ways and observe the results of our experiments.

# 2: Communication Skills: Words transmit only 7% of the communication. 38% is delivered with our tone of voice and 56% by our body language. Remember that rolling your eyes at a statement of your partner conveys more harm to the communication than saying: 'I don't agree with what you are saying.'

# 3: Understanding. Remember that the goal of your conversation with your partner isn't necessarily to seek agreement, but to communicate understanding.

# 4: Self-esteem: YOUR self-esteem is unconditional, it is your birthright as a human being, it does not need to be earned - it is a given. Your partner is not able to take it from you, nor are they responsible to give you YOUR self-esteem, that is for you to realise and experience.

# 5: Accept Change. Relationships will inevitably change over time. Face up to the reality of who you truly are and who your partner is, accept and welcome change and grow with it.

# 6: Look after yourself. When two people in a relationship each look after themselves, then both are being looked after. That does not mean that you become egoistically focused on yourself but that you take responsibility for your own well-being and happiness and do not expect your partner to be responsible to make you happy.

# 7: Give in, let go, move on. Although it may not be easy, try letting go of the idea that you need to win arguments with your partner in order to prove an upper moral hand. Consider whether it might be better to simply forfeit fights from time to time.

# 8: Laugh about yourself. Remember to not take yourself too seriously in the relationship. Laughing about yourself and your patterns of reactions sometimes makes it easier to relate. And it allows your partner to join you.

# 9: Open your heart. Have you realised that when your partner talks about their feelings (even if it is that they are upset at you) it does not really help to apply logic or reason? It is better to just listen with an open heart and communicate empathy. Easier said than done? Just practice.

# 10: The key to successful relating is not found in complex theories or convoluted formulas for behaviour. It is based on the deepest feeling of love, respect and affection for your partner, and is demonstrated simply through empathy and understanding. Good relating begins in your heart, and then continues on a moment-to-moment basis by engaging your partner when feelings run high, when they are sad, angry or hurt. The heart of relating is being there in a particular way when it really counts.

Do You Have a Healthy Relationship?

Do You Have a Healthy Relationship? 3 Signs of a Healthy Relationship! You Don't Want to Miss This!
I bet you think that you have a healthy relationship. After all, most people do. But why is it then, that the divorce rate is above 50%, and why is it much higher for people who date?

You see, what most people consider to be a healthy relationship, is actually a relationship which is deteriorating...BUT, as long as you catch the unhealthy signs early, you can make sure it doesn't ruin your relationship!

Read on to find out whether or not you have a healthy relationship...

Sign #1 That You Have A Healthy Relationship: Two DIFFERENT Opinions

You can have two different opinions without getting mad at each other. A lot of couples will argue till their face gets blue when they experience a difference in opinions, BUT, if you and your partner can have a difference of opinions without feeling hurt or without wanting to chop each other's heads off...this means your relationship is healthy.

You see, whenever there is a mutual understanding, you will notice that you can share different ideas without feeling as if it's just not working out, because you understand each other, you don't let every small disagreement get in the way of the bigger picture.

Sign #2 That You Have A Healthy Relationship: You Aren't BORED

You may not be aware of this, but boredom is the number one cause of cheating. If you find yourself always feeling bored or always expecting your partner to entertain you...then you are on the verge of pushing your relationship into an unhealthy one.

Healthy relationships do not have partners who constantly depend on each other to keep each other entertained, because they can naturally find new ways to challenge each other.

Welcome challenges into your relationship, because they will prevent both of you from becoming bored, and in the end both of you will always feel satisfied.

Sign #3 That You Have A Healthy Relationship: You Can Let Things Go

Do you or your partner let things go, or do both of you hold grudges? You see, if you find that neither of you can easily let issues go, and that both of you always bring it up in future arguments, this is a sign of an unhealthy relationship.

In a healthy relationship, both partners will be able to easily let things go, because they are working together, not against each other. They are also able to let things go more easily, because they change and make efforts not to make the same mistakes again.

This is because each partner knows what they want from each other and from themselves. When you don't know what you want, you will find that you feel offended easily when your partner does something which isn't exactly what you expect... and you will also find that you may like one thing about them one minute, but a month later hate that same exact thing.

You should also understand that the reason why neither of you is able to let things go, is because neither of you wants to change, and if neither of you is willing to change, the relationship is going to go nowhere, because every healthy relationship has a healthy amount of change, which is the kind of change that moves both of you forward.

How to Save a Relationship From Breaking Up!

When a relationship is on the verge of going downhill there are some warning signals. All of us identify these signals but use the ostrich approach. We bury our heads in the sand and pretend that things will tide over by themselves. But that never happens. If you want to save your relationship from breaking up then here are the things that you need to start doing.

Look at the symptoms
Begin to identify the symptoms that make you feel like your relationship is heading southward. It could be your spouse or partner avoiding you or being mean. It could be too many unnecessary fights or it could be cheating. Be open and honest and look at all the symptoms that present themselves.

Identify the causes
Now the symptoms are not what is wrong with your relationship. It's the underlying cause that encourages these symptoms that is the problem. Identify these causes if you want to save the relationship. These obviously are not going to be pretty so steel yourself and be ready to face the truth.
Start talking
Most relationships fail because communication stops. Start talking to your partner/spouse and openly discuss the causes and symptoms that you have been analyzing. Sometimes this is enough to get a relationship back on track.
Don't let opposition deter you
If your partner has still not come to accept that the relationship is dwindling, you will be faced with some opposition. You have to show your maturity and perseverance at a time like this and convince the other person that your relationship needs some hard work.

Don't take advice
Most couples go and talk to their friends when they begin to suspect something is amiss in the relationship. Friends cannot offer unbiased advice and often agree with things that are not. Also they are afraid of unbalancing the personal equation they share with you and will not be harsh or completely truthful when needed.

Confide in a counselor
The best thing to do is to head to a counselor who will be able to give you an objective opinion on everything and will help you chalk out a way of salvaging the relationship. Since he/she will not know you at a personal level helping you will become a lot easier.

Have patience
Simply going to a counselor does not make things ok. You will have to work hard and walk together on the path shown by him/her. Things take time to sort out so have patience and continue to work hard on your relationship and save it from breaking up.

What You Don’t Know Will Hurt You!

Long time ago men where accustomed to the old saying “what you don’t know won’t hurt you”. That may be true in the world of cliché’s, but in life nothing could be further from the truth. Any one who still believes this in this century is living in a fool’s paradise. Young people lark knowledge of what is hurting them and it is the very source and reason for their hurts.


I have come to understand that the average teenager and young adult often think under peer pressure and lacks correct information about the opposite sex. A common misconception for guys is thinking that a girl wants to become sexually involved, but becoming sexually involved in hopes of gaining this relationship but not realizing that they are only pursuing them for sex. The reality is that in both cases there is lack of information and each is affected in some way.


The guys cant understand why the girls wants to hold on to them while they have other girls pursuing them for that same reason and the girls can’t understand why the guys don’t want a relationship.


In most cases, it is the girls who is hurt worse because she can get pregnant and her scars are revealed physically and are deeply felt. She is also scared emotionally. Her emotional makeup causes her not to want to hop from one guy to another, whereas a guy’s emotional makeup causes him to want to go after everything
In skirt that looks good.

What you don’t know will hurt you!

Watch out for the next post – What guys and girls don’t know about each other.

Stay posted!